What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 30.06.2025 10:07
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Would the word literate carry the same meaning with public (common wealth) in 1900 vs today 2020?
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
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Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
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Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
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In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Is Max Verstappen unstoppable this season?
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
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Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
What one thing makes someone a very mature person?
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Laborum vero molestiae dolorem tenetur doloribus delectus.
Make Nazis afraid again!
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
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And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
TEXT:
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
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Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …